Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Worry
Well I'm sort of tired, and I dread quitting smoking. Not that I don't want to quit, I dread what I have to go through to quit. I will keep busy, Like cleaning my car, digging up the cacti from my yard, crocheting....sucking on commit lozenges. A friend of mine gave me a book yesterday entitled "Women who worry too much", to the point of generalized anxiety disorder. Yep, that's me. I realize that a lot of what upsets me is on me, and others view me as some sort of crazy person. I have a tendency to zone in on someone who is a slacker, a liar and just altogher annoying and fret myself to death over it. Plus I worry about other things to the point that I don't sleep well, my muscles are tense all the time, and I get headaches. I guess I'll keep the jounal and do the exercises the book suggests and see what happens. If worry and anxiety are interfering w/ my ability to enjoy life then I need to learn how to quit worrying about things that are stupid to worry about.
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Just so you know, you are every bit as tough as me, maybe even more so. You have faced just as many challenges, but used your advantages to make something of yourself, where I allowed fear of failure to keep me from doing that. Now I have the desire, but not the means. But it will all come around again, soon enough. The chances are always going to come. Worry is a difficult thing to overcome. You have to do a certain amount of it, I feel, as it motivates us to change a bad situation. But things you know you have no control over are the things worry should not be a part of. Good luck on the quitting smoking. I stand by the patch. It was the only way I could quit. A steady stream of nicotine to the system. Never even missed it. Weaned myself off it after the psychological addiction was kicked.
I love you.
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